The Truth About Music: Play It Loud

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Holy Murder. Someone Please Punch “The Situation” in the Throat

The cast of Jersey Shore is the reason why intelligent people support abortion. How this show is popular still baffles me to levels of crippling confusion. It’s a reality show based on a group of people who offer absolutely nothing to society in any way, shape or form. And all parties involved need to have boiling oil poured all over their bodies.

But this is old news. I already rode the horse berating the morons on said show. My new gripe is with one of the dudes who calls himself ” The Situation” Seriously dude? The only Situation that’s needed around here is someone needs to put a bullet in his skull.

Anyhow, Mr. tan skin and ab’s just put out an abomination to music known as ” The Situation”. Holy shit could this poster child for down syndrome be any less artistic more autistic? Really, you couldn’t have even come up with a title for your song? Nope, just rely on street cred…wait you’re a moron who goes around banging retarded fame obsessed whores with no self pride. Good for you. I hope when your dying of skin cancer it was all worth it.

But, this isn’t about him, it’s about how fucking stupid the song is. First off, he uses a vocoder. Yep, just like T-Pain would use. And you know what? He still sounds like a talentless cunt. Any song that uses the words: Get that stack, get that ass and drink that Jaq, make me want to die. “Take that hottie home” is a central theme here…but why?

Everything about the song is awful. There clearly is no God, otherwise he’d have offered a wave of epidemic when this group of brain surgeons sat around a table and decided to allocate money and time spent away from dersevring talent for this sloping brow knuckle dragger to write “lyrics”. What makes it worse is that Fat man scoop, who’s done some credible work with Missy Elliot, is the producer and hype man. Apparently someone is on the down side of their musical career. This is like the time when the Harlem Globetrotters were on Scooby Doo.

Music just jumped the shark. The song sounds like a bad jock jam. Remember jock Jams? Yep, they still suck too. The song is trying it’s hardest to be apart of this new club sound that The Black Eyed Pea’s and David Guetta and Usher are currently enjoying the benefits from. Only the hook, the beat and the “rapping” are terrible. There is no musical promise to this whatsoever. Every moment of this song reminds a man of getting kicked in the balls repeatedly by an elephant sized man with cleats. It sucks that bad.

Final thought: For the love of god, this song is terrible. I demand John Conner send the Terminator from the future and kill The Situation.

You can here a sample over @ the TMZ:

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2 Legacy Comments

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