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“Jersey Shore” Guidos Battling the Beat

Some real life guidos and guidettes in action!!

Some real life guidos and guidettes in action!!

As you may have read, in my colleagues article: ‘”Jersey Shore” Impacting Real Life Guidos‘, MTV’s “Jersey Shore” and its cast of Guidos and  Guidettes are taking the entertainment world by storm. With more and more viewers every week the show is picking up and the cast have been featured on Late Night TV shows such as Conan and Funny or Die videos. But where Harris and I differ are in our opinions of the effect of the show on people who are “practicing” the life of a Guido.

Harris seems to think the show is having a completely negative effect on the proud race that is Guido, and he feels that people only watch the show to mock them. I am not a Guido, and in fact I am a “hater” as they would call it. I actually do watch the show to mock and laugh at them, and I find their customs to be asinine and their intelligence to be equivalent to that of a cerebral paulsie patient, but you can’t argue with the fact that, as idiotic as they may seem, their methods work. There are many women who aren’t Guidettes who are very interested in Guidos. Whether its just because they are for the most part in ridiculous shape, is another story, but I know several women who are the furthest thing from Guidettes, and love everything about Guidos, and have made a habit of dating them.

This is where I argue against Harris’s point, that being a Guido is no longer cool. Being a 21 year old from New York, I have been going out to bars for about 6 months now. From local bars, to clubs in NYC, to bars up in Boston where I am for most of the year. Guidos where previously only found in NYC night clubs and places like the Jersey Shore. Never in local town bars and especially never in bars in Boston. Since the premiere of “Jersey Shore” I have seen the number of Guidos increase exponentially in these locations. I was out with Harris the other night with the young lady from Maryland who basically equated seeing a Guido to witnessing a Unicorn walk down Broadway. I was surprised that she had never actually seen one. I was skeptical of the area in White Plains, NY and its Guido capacity. Having gone there almost every weekend over the summer and not seeing too many Guidos, I said something along the lines of, “I doubt you’ll see a Guido tonight.” To my surprise, at around 11 pm, It seemed as if a convoy of Cadillacs dropped of a platoon of Guidos, and her wish came true.

I don’t think the show is hurting Guidos. I can agree that everyone started to watch the show to mock them, but now I’d say that many people have changed their opinions of Guidos and realized, “shit, steroids and hair gel works!” (I am not advocating becoming a Guido because it may actually be harmful to your health: Skin Cancer, Decreased Liver Function, Testicular Shrinkage, Hepatitis, and a whole gaggle of STD’s). We should look for a future filled with Guidos, and a possible schism between true Italians and Guidos, because although many people are jumping on the Guido bandwagon, true Italians aren’t fans, and are in fact rightfully embarrassed by them. I would agree that Guidos are going to be on TV more, so if you are a Guido, like Harris says, you should go to a casting call.

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2 Legacy Comments

  • Comment by Greg posted January 09, 2010 at 11:29

    There is just so much wrong with this idk where to begin. Lets start with your one and only good point; the schism between true italians and guidos. A guido is no longer italian, but any tool with the above mentioned trait; true italians despise them and are disgusted by the show.
    There may in fact be a rise in the guido population in other parts of the country, not because “it works” but because its hysterical to mock and ridicule these beings to no end. I am reminded of the resurgence of flavor-flav and how every one and their mother was seen shouting “FLAVOR FLAV”. People did this not to be him but to make fun of him. Now let us look at your reasoning for this, getting girls. What ever play a guido had in the past is dying, girls that were into them that werent perceived as guidettes will have to either jump on the bandwagon and accept their guidette nature or deny their guilty pleasure to save themselves from ridicule from their friends. Finally there is the statement that is the most false in the article, but one that i find often within the population of guidos. This is of course your denial of your guido nature; sadly Jon you are a guido. I agree not in all aspects of the definition but in enough to count. There is hope however, but to achieve a state of normality again you have to follow the steps of AA and admit your problem.

  • Comment by Jon posted January 11, 2010 at 15:59

    I feel your pain Greg. As an Italian I’m sure you are frustrated with this show and needed an outlet to unleash your anger. But you must keep in mind that this is simply an opinion and never did i declare any of it as fact. That being said, I forgive you for your comment, and as insulting as you may think your being, I, like I said am not a guido, but rather simply enjoy dressing nicely and looking my best, and unlike your curly hair, I have straight hair, thus allowing me to spike it, but never in my life have I had a blowout. So if the fact that I dress well and do my hair classifies me as a guido, then I think the guido population just grew exponentially over night. But like I said, I forgive you, and appreciate the constructive criticism and I am glad you are taking the time to read what I post.